The other week, I attended a live workshop downtown in NYC. One of the attendees who sees behind the scenes of a lot of online entrepreneur’s businesses shared that lately, many women are actually OUTPERFORMING men as online entrepreneurs.
What do you think about that?
I think a whole lot of things about that, but something that definitely seems to be true, is that the online world is really calling for more of a human touch.
It got me wondering if we, as women entrepreneurs, are doing the industry a solid by combining our business and savvy smarts with our natural talents for caring for others to give that human touch people are crying out for. Of course, men are able to create that killer combo as well.
But as a woman, I think we do have a natural, maternal side, that gives a certain touch or feel to our audience, that’s priceless.
The trouble is, I still have a bone a pick with some of you.
Because some of us haven’t allowed ourselves to utilize this killer combo.
I truly believe that I was put on the planet to be one of the humans that helps to shift some things that have been ingrained in us, as women, for far too long.
So today, I’m gonna do my job. I’m gonna do my part of waking up more women, to start taking up a F***-Ton more space in this online world.
Disclaimer: You may love what I have to say or you may hate it. And if you hate it, and it triggers you, then maybe you’re the kind of woman who needs to hear it the most. Additionally, I am more than happy to to be the target of your anger, if it gets the job done.
Regardless… it’s all in love, and service to you. I mean that with my whole heart.
So here are some of the reasons that you might be hiding your light under a ROCK.
1) You live in VictimVille/ You’re a Control Freak
As women, perhaps many of us are naturally maternal, and that’s a strength. But like any strength, it’s a strength, until it becomes a weakness when it’s not kept in check.
And all of our behaviors are teaching others, about our priorities.
Definition of Victim: A great or constant sufferer.
Are you someone who tries to do it all? If so, how’s that going for ya?
I know you like to take care of everyone, and wear ALL HATS in your business. But guess what, if you don’t start getting your message out, and acting like the CEO, instead of an assistant, you become exhausted.
In fact, you CAN’T be a leader in that instance. What you CAN do, is end up building up resentment; and/or later in life saying that you lived it for everyone but you. Truth be told, if these are the rules you’re living by, especially in terms of running your business, you have no one to blame but yourself <3
It’s SO easy to wish for the results of a World Changer, while taking the role of major martyr.
If you act overwhelmed, hopeless, and like it’s too much… then it is, and you are.
So, BE the visionary, and get the support that you need to take action, instead of carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders.
You cannot do it all.
If you’re the owner and visionary for your business, then I can tell you what you’re not:
- You’re not a Web Designer.
- You’re not a Virtual Assistant designing lead pages, formatting emails, etc.
- You’re not an Online Business Manager.
- You’re not a FB Ad Specialist.
- You’re not a Social Media Manager.
- You’re not an Editor.
- You’re not a PDF Designer.
- You’re not CRM Specialist.
Unless you ARE one of these roles, which is AWESOME!
Question: How can you let go of the million things you’ve decided YOU need to do, and start asking for help and support and let go of your control freak-ness enough to step into specialist, expert, CEO, and world changer.
Isn’t that why you started this business in the first place?
2) You don’t want to be Spammy or Sales-y
I get it, but I want you to think think about something…
Think about another woman that you love. Is it your daughter, your sister, your mother, your grandmother, your best friend, your sister from another mister, your aunt, your little niece?
What’s a gift she has to share with the world? Something that you’re proud of her for? Something that’s special about her?
Now, how would you feel if you saw someone walk up to her while she was joyfully sharing her gift, and say to her, “Stop that, you’re drawing too much attention to yourself. Keep that to yourself.”
That’s right, what if she was told to be quiet about her gifts?
What would you do?
What might you say to her?
I’m guessing you’d tell her to keep on keepin’ on and to NEVER forget the gifts she has and how they can help change the world.
If you’re with me, great!
And, if you feel that way, then stop BEING that person who is TEACHING her that she SHOULD hide her gifts, by hiding your OWN.
Is it because you “don’t feel worthy,” “aren’t sure you’re good enough,” “feel worried that no one will invest to work with you”?
One of the reasons I OWN my offers, is because my mom taught me to. She did it before she even knew she was doing it.
She was told she wasn’t smart enough to get a PhD in Chemistry, by another woman, no less. But she did it anyway, as one of the ONLY women. And when I heard that story, and taught me that I could do the things I wanted to do no matter what other people thought.
But not all of us are that lucky or privileged.
That means we have to take on the responsibility ourselves, in terms of what we teach the other women around us about their own worth and ability to share their gifts.
Historically, women were not land owners and they didn’t control wealth, with a few exceptions.
It wasn’t until 1978, that most woman in this country could get their own credit cart without a man co-signing.
Today, only 9% of executives are women. That’s all.
Isn’t it about effin’ time that we end the legacy and get over ourselves a little bit? Get over the fear? Because it’s not really about your fear, unless you make it.
When you think sales are icky, and offering your gifts are sleazy, you teach yourself and everyone else, to CONTINUE buying into a LEGACY of women being 2nd class in our relationship with impact, resources, and as business owners. Yup, you just keep being a part of locking us all in to the legacy.
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3) You’re a FRAUD!
You’re a fraud, right?
At least that’s what you’re worried might be true.
Well hey, maybe you are and maybe you aren’t.
I’ve never meet a client of mine who didn’t genuinely care about helping others.
The thing is, even the most successful humans feel that fear, BUT, they don’t act on it.
AND lady, EVERYbody’s gotta start somewhere.
In that workshop I attended, there were ALL women attendees and only one man who was attending.
This man? Well, he chimed in quite a bit. He sure as hell took up some space in the room and he didn’t seem to mind one bit. You’d have thought that maybe it was his workshop that he was hosting.
What I found so fascinating is that I noticed myself, and just about every other woman in the room apologize for asking too many questions at least once.
In my own group programs, I’ve got amazing women, but I have never in my life heard a group of men speak so much about their fear of being visible, or charging that price. Never EVER.
It seems it’s a constant battle for a significant amount of women.
The thing is, you start seeing yourself differently, when you start making different choices and getting out of your comfort zone, and STOP apologizing for yourself.
You ONLY need a glimmer of your gifts, that’s all, and then it’s time to start acting on them, so you can master your gifts and develop your craft to expert level.
A mentor of mine said, you can’t course correct while standing still. And it’s true.
That means it’s time for you to ditch all three of these things that might be stopping you from really going for it and remember that it’s so much bigger than just you and your fears.
To stepping out,
Shared in love,